Gene Andrew Peppard

Boy :   SATs  *  Basketball  *  Life  *  Single  *  School  *  Decisions  *  Stress  *  Growth  *  Study

what's that Phil Lynnot song?

It's a good thing that regardless of how bad we mess up the teenage years with Gene, we get to start again with the others messing up their teenage years too and making a whole new set of rules and mistakes.  Maybe because he is the eldest by four whole years the focus is on him a wee bit too much.  I know that I have been overly involved in his life and relationships in the past and now it's time for me to step back.  Step a-way from the growing boy.  Let him make his own mistakes.  Let him try out a few choices on his own.  The results might not necessarily be all bad.  Today when Mikey said something inappropriate to one of Neil's friends, Gene yelled from a nearby room "MIKEY!  CUT that OUT.  You're JUST going to make them feel AWKWARD".  (I was very surprised.  Gene is no stranger to making people feel awkward.)  I should add the interaction that followed when Mikey yelled "WHERE are you Gene?"  Gene yelled back "I'm in the BATHROOM taking a SHIT".  The inference here is that maturity comes in tiny, tiny steps and that it might take many, many years to learn to temper all that noise and energy into a walking, talking, gentleman.  And the song?

Too much to say and none of it can be said.

Gene and Tori broke up.
That's that.
The Peppards' still ♥ this girl.

Raising a Teenage Boy

Is hard.  Frustrating.  Occasionally fun.  Mostly hard.
The end.

Maybe normal

Life might be getting back to normal.  Busy.  Crowded.  Noisy.  I like it like this.  My favorite thing right now is having all Gene's friends here.  Before I had a big, strong, loud, hairy one of these I found this age and stage pretty intimidating.  Having one all of my own dispelled a lot of the myth.  They are pretty nice.  Feed them and they talk.  Do their laundry and they could care less and never thank you, however run out of clean clothes for them and they are confused regardless of the HUGE, ENORMOUS, PILE of dirty clothes that they stumble over getting out of bed in the morning.  They are amazingly coordinated AND amazingly Uncoordinated at the same time.  They are full of contradictions and conflict.  I really, really like mine.  And I really, really, really like his friends!

Boys: Assorted

Extra boys!  How I LOVE to have a house full of extra boys!  Gene's friends: They eat.  They are noisy.  They LOVE the zipline.  They are kind to the siblings.  They play too much xbox.  Trent and Joey play pool (and sometimes Trent wins).  And they are so, SO full of life and movement and energy and have no filters whatsoever.  I will attempt to take a photograph of them, but honestly, I don't know if I am up to the job.  They are not easily slowed down or stopped long enough to get any kind of decent pic. 

Meet the-Blogalots

 I think we all know that GUS has a blog....  Neil now has one at school and (da ta da da!) so does Gene!  I got a quick look at it last night at his Open House and it's cool.  Funnily, in a recent post he emphasized a point by using ALL  CAPS.  I asked his teacher is she approved that and she said it was appropriate given the context.  (She is pretty amazing and if Gene tunes in just a little he will leave that class smarter, funnier, more broadminded, savvier, wittier, with a better vocabulary and maybe even better looking.)  (Yes, she really IS  THAT  good.)

Gene

16.  Sixteen on the sixteenth.  This is the "Golden Birthday" according to Lisa B's family.  This kid is tall.  And he eats a lot.  And he DOES swear (just a little), like he's trying it on for size.  Funny.  Sarcastic.  X Box King.  And did I mention tall?? 

Gene. Can you bring me to town?

I suggested that Gene should take the written portion of his Driver's License test just to see how it read, what was expected... take some of the mystery out of it.  We headed into town early, the little ones and I waited while he took it and : "what the"...... He PASSED it!  Scored  in the high nineties.  Then the lady processing his paperwork asked when he wanted to do his actual test and added that she had a cancellation for that day if he wanted to come back after lunch.  Let's just cut to the chase here.  We killed some time in town, came back and by mid afternoon he was issued his actual Driver's License.  (This time I was prepared for the Organ Donor question, when Gene (predictably stalled and choked when asked the question) I stuck my noggin in her field of vision and said "Yes, he'll be an Organ Donor" and then rolled my eyes at Gene and asked "Have we not been through this already?? tsk tsk."

Hold that thought....

Gene is starting at Crescent on Tuesday.  Or, as I like to say... consistency and order are the keys to good parenting...  (oh  ha.  ha.  ha.)  The change of heart stemmed from a conversation with my friend Sabina (who does not read this blog) who suggested we "man up" to the decision we have so obviously already made but are afraid to execute.  So... after talking to Sabina I immediately made an appointment with the principal at Crescent (this was a trick move on my part because by setting an appointment I knew that only one result could come from the meeting).  It worked.  Crescent listened to us, asked pertinent questions, told us what they would do if Gene were in their school ... and we signed the boy up.

The ironic thing is that that very same day one year before was Gus's first day in 2nd Grade with Mrs Curtin.  That was the right move for Gus AND for us...  Neil started six months after Gus and that was the right move for Neil... and six months later I firmly believe that it is the right move for Gene.

The little boys are thrilled...  Now can I get away with taking Gene's "first day" photo as he gets on the bus with Gene and Neil on Tuesday morning??

Roughriders Versus Loggers

Gene is not (for the time being) going to change school.  He and Trent came up with some plan where he had to make up his mind what he wanted and then follow accordingly with good grades.  He has until March to prove that it's worth my while driving him out of district (albeit to a great school) when there is a great school right here a bus ride (make that a FREE bus ride) away.  I strongly suspect that he will be established at Crescent by summer.

Well, THAT was easy!

Trent took Gene to get his permit (turns out I couldn't actually get it last week, he had to wait until he had actually turned 15). Gene recounted the conversation: Trent: "So, Gene, are you going to be an organ donor?" Gene: "I dunno... it's SOOO weird." Trent: "Well... in our house EVERYONE is a donor." So, Gene is a donor...

OMG

Gene is almost 15. I'd use many wonderful and colourful expletives here but I'm bound by our house rule of only using positive words. #%^(*!

Don't ask, don't tell

While getting Gene's Learners Permit at the Department of Motor Vehicles I asked if he wanted to sign the Organ Donor agreement making him an organ donor. He said (in a classically teen aged way) "I dunno... how does it work"... I explained that it didn't mean anything unless he died.... so that AFTER his death his organs could be given to someone who was going to die without a transplant. He shrugged again and said "I dunno... maybe... I dunno". I said "you don't have to decide right NOW and then added, but I don't have to feed you for the next four years either!" and he smirked at me and I smirked back. In the car I asked him to explain his concern. (Now, I SOOO understand that this is a VERY difficult concept for a teenager to understand and I'd imagine there are lots of teenagers who do NOT sign up to be organ donors, unless they have a connection to someone who is terminally ill on a transplant list or someone who has had a transplant etc etc AND I SOOO do not take this personally, HOWEVER Gene is becoming an adult and adults DO have to face things that are distasteful and/or difficult to process or face and he DOES know someone how has an illness that could require a transplant some day (and we have always been very open with this). So my point is??? This is another example of why we should question allowing kids to get behind the wheel of a car at age 15!!! They are still immature and still have little or no awareness of their own mortality (of course most people are still that way at age 25!)

The organ donor issue is a moot point because we would be making that awful decision for our children anyway. BUT.... this is also an instance where I shouldn't have asked the question if I was okay with the answer regardless of how Gene felt about it. I am certain (oh yes, CERTAIN) that by the time Gene gets his "real" license he will be an organ donor because he will know that in our house there is no other choice. (As if there was a choice in the first place.)

Gene/Basketball

Gene is away at a basketball camp. He chipped his tooth (not a front one, thank GOD) but he'll have to go to the dentist when he gets home. He calls (as required) every night, but I've realised that I may need to be a little more specific in telling him my expectations of the call. He calls to tell us he is calling. He then proceeds to answer any questions we have with mostly one word answers. (Strangely, he isn't trying to be rude... he just doesn't get it.) I know that he wants to get the call out of the way so he can go back to doing whatever he was doing (???!) but we may have to role play a few phone calls so I can show him what I need in order to pay his way on another trip like this!!

Knockout Smile... it's officially recognized by an expert....

Gene may not have much motivation when it comes to his grades... but he has great teeth. This kid has missed brushing his teeth maybe a handful of times in his life. I guess we did something right with him... He even flosses regularly. His dentist all but wept. 

Testing Ahead

Gene starts Eighth Grade WASL in two weeks. I am so glad that by the time Neil goes back to public school the whole testing mess may be resolved. I know that there will be some sort of test to replace WASL or at least to modify it from it's ridiculous current format. Neil will however, begin ITBS (The Iowa Test of Basic Skills) next week. He has awful pretest nerves, which many people have suggested might be relieved by the routine-ness of the annual WASL. I disagree... Even if it would make him less nervous, is that really enough reason for any kid to spend weeks completing testing that really does not result in tools to help address issues. Nor does it build self-esteem when many children simply can't pass all areas. Gene no longer anticipates passing each subject (many kids do pass all areas, but it's usually a handful per school) and how does it help when after five years of WASL Gene has learned that he more than likely will not pass. Repeatedly doing the test hasn't made Gene a better student and it hasn't taught him anything. (It's true that he doesn't seem nervous about testing.)

So, Neil will do ITBS through our home school group next week. His biggest fear is that he won't know what to do and he won't be able to ask questions. His reading has improved vastly in the last six months, but I think that a lot of his fears stem from sitting down to a stack of papers, and becoming overwhelmed by the amount of language... the actual amount of print in front of him.

My gut reaction is to keep him from this process altogether. However, I believe that because he will reenter public school at some point in the future, it would not make sense to leave him unprepared for any testing. And, I have to admit, that at 10 years of age he should be able to overcome his fears sufficiently gain some faith in himself. His biggest obstacle is his lack of belief that he is actually smart.

Let the testing begin.

I, on the other hand, get to hang out with Bay for two hours a day at the testing center. IN the car. (Great.) I can hardly wait.

Gene's Got Game

Okay... so I am one of the world's worst for under-rating my children's achievement. Today I packed up the kids and went to Gene's basketball game. It's kind of a hassle, one that I have avoided (with many good reasons) during his season. CRAP! The kid is a good player. He was all over the court! People were shouting HIS name!!! I was SO proud... and I do NOT get excited about sports (I know that this is a bad thing, I blame it on my upbringing). The game was SO close but they lost and I felt SO disappointed! At one point Bay was whining and wanted to: go home; have cheese and crackers (which I hadn't brought); go to the bathroom; watch a movie; and Trent turned to me, gave me a quick kiss and said "see you later" (assuming that I would, as usual be only too happy to pack them up and head home). I looked at him open mouthed... they were in 4 minutes of overtime with only a four point spread... There was NO way I could leave. I was so excited for Gene!